Nonparticipation Awards

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Are people on the internet interested in something you don’t care about? Are young people doing a new dance craze you don’t understand? Is there a form of popular media you don’t like? Then get ready for The Nonparticipation Games!

Compete with others to see who is most apathetic! Learn the best ways to suck all the fun out of life. Practice mocking your teammates for daring to have any interests, and learn to be the most boring conversationalist.

At The Nonparticipation Games, you can finally be appreciated for the whining sack of potatoes you truly are. Find like minded friends who also hate hobbies, passions, and fandoms. Encourage each other to aim for new volumes of douchiness.

Events at the Games include:

  • Refusing to dance – whoever can resist the beat longest wins
  • Complaining about change -channel your inner Abe Simpson
  • Tearing others down – how even dare they like things?

There will also be seminars and training sessions for amateur nonparticipants. Experts at not doing or liking things will teach you the secrets of austere apathy. In a crafting session you can design your own wank stained copy of Walden Pond, the only book you’ll ever need.

Space is limited, so register today!

DISCLAIMER: The Games are made up. There are no rewards in life for not enjoying popular shared cultural touchstones. There definitely are no prizes for mistreating people who do.

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